The Faux-Sus Scrofa Domesticus Principle

I would say that, as a former meat eater, the only things I possibly miss are roast beef and of course, the usual one, bacon.  I no longer miss roast beef but veggie bacon was always a let down for me.  I can handle that sausages are not porky or horsey.  The beef slices from Quorn are not amazingly beefy.  The chicken pieces, like real chicken, have their flavour changed with a good bit of stock and 20 minutes thought.  But the bacon… this was never really a winner… until I analysed it.

Talking to people who know another secret recipe, I have finally cracked how to make a Quorn Bacon sandwich taste like the real thing.  So – for you, exclusively on my blog until I copy and paste – here is how to make a really tasty Quorn Bacon sandwich.  You need a frying pan, a hob and if possible to do the de-frost, a microwave.


  • Quorn Bacon – 1 frozen packet from the freezer in your local supermarket. Must be Quorn, must be frozen. Any other brand tastes very different. Did I mention it must be the frozen variety, not the fridge?
  • Salt – preferably sea salt in the grinder
  • Olive Oil
  • Sauce – your choice of
  • Bread – two slices minimum
  • Salad (Optional but I like it)
  • Hot beverage (Tea or coffee)


  1. Quorn Bacon in SaltingDefrost the Quorn Vegetarian Bacon in the microwave – two minutes and then leave to stand for 15 minutes.  If you are re-freezing 4 slices, take the 4 off you want to use and put the rest in the freezer.  You can also leave the pack in the fridge over night or put it in the sun for an afternoon or in your polytunnel for the week.  There’s room for a bit of freestyling here.
  2. Heat your pan and add two teaspoons of olive oil at most.
  3. Lay your veggie bacon out on a chopping board and crack salt over the top of the bacon substitute to ‘cure’ it.  Not sure what we’re curing it of but comments welcome on that.Turning the bacon
  4. Put the bacon into the frying pan salt down and cook until you suspect it is crispy or burning.  Salt the now-top side and turn.  Not toss – that could result in no one wanting to try your sandwich if it all goes wrong… which it will.
  5. Take the two slices of bread.  Check for mould and then place them on a plate.  Put your chosen sauce on each slice.Quorn Bacon Sandwich
  6. Take the cooked bacon out and add to the sandwich. I like 4 slices with some salad between them but that’s just me.  Some people prefer cheese, but they’re not here to argue the case on that one.  Freestyle a bit more with it.
  7. Eat, with a beverage of choice.

Sandwich with CoffeeBon appetite.  The secret ingredient, much like the Colonel?  It’s the salt…


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